Yes, it’s my birthday. Yes, apparently it was a big one. And no, we didn’t do anything for it, nor marked it.
Matter of fact, this is the only thing I made for it and one of only 2 or 3 pics for the day. And, we Menuloged in dinner and then forgot to even get the cupcakes out to eat them. How low key is that?
I am not a big party girl. Don’t get me wrong, if you are having a party, I will be there, pretty dress and celebrate it loudly. However, when it comes to me, I don’t know why, I don’t enjoy the fuss. I get embarrassed and awkward. The introvert in me shuts down and I retreat. My last celebrated birthday was my 30th.
While it seems strange to say this, given my profession, I don’t like the attention on me when it’s for personal reasons. Am happy to get up on stage, and make cakes and present awards and laugh and crack joke, love it to be honest, but have a crowd sing me happy birthday and I die a thousand deaths internally.
Last week on one of my fav pages on insta they put up a post that nailed it. Thought I would share it, does it resonate with you too?
As I get older, I try to correct certain aspects of my character or try new things, get out of my comfort zones on regular occasions. So this year, I put on my new dress, a little eye liner and pretty lipstick and did a little video for socials to announce free freight Australia wide on my website for the week for all orders over $50.
It took me 14 takes to finally get one to use and even then, I wasn’t happy. I let hubby and family pick the one to use for socials.
It might seem like it was done just to do a sale, but it was more than that for me. It was me, actually telling people it was my birthday, as I even have FB turned off for my birthday so it doesn’t tell people, secondly, I never say my age as I am sick of people judging a stupid number that in no way reflects my ability, my future and my potential and finally, trying to be more online, more accessible, more presence etc.
So, under the excuse of a sale, I managed to get way out of my comfort zone to post it up. Blow away by the number of messages and kind words. Laughed and felt good to reason so many had no idea my age.
Am I worried now to considered passe and judged by my number? Yes. Female and 50…. it’s basically a death sentence for women for their career, their appeal, their net worth and marketability.
So why am I doing it? Typical bloody Aquarius, I refuse to conform, refuse to give in and be dammed if I am going to let it happen. Time for a change!!!
I can honestly say, hand on heart, I haven’t peaked yet. Haven’t even begun to slow down, quite the opposite, I am hungrier now more than even… and still learning, still maturing but most importantly, still not sure what I want to do when I grow up!
Quite a blog I have created here. Not cake related was it! But nice to peel off a little rose petal layer and show a little more of me.
So the big question is, who is with me? Who wants to charge into our decades with renewed passions, vitality and purpose? Who else feels that this number attached to our names means fuck all and we will wear what we want, go where we want, tackle any project we want and not be held back by it!
That’s enough out of me for now.
Peace out, Monica